all my life, I’ve never known what i wanted, im supposed to be dead. its hard to plan and figure out, when you dont expect to see yourself alive in the near future. i hate how i can’t decide, i hate how i can’t do the things i want to do without money, i hate how im so unmotivated and always uncomfortable. i dont know what to do i just want to cry amd die
It sounds like you’ve been feeling this hopelessness for a long time now, and it sounds like you’re deeply unsatisfied with a lot of things in your life, and a strong level of self-hatred.
First off, I think you need to take some credit for simply staying alive.And crying is okay! But I would like to understand more- what do you mean by the ‘things you’d want to do’? and what do you mean by ‘always uncomfortable.’ Is it a mental uncomfortable (e.g. thoughts and feelings) or is it a physical uncomfortable (seeing something in person and feeling uncomfortable).
And remember, you don’t need to have everything figured out just yet.
thank you for your vulnerability… it must be hard to admit these.
it’s okay to not have everything figured out. one day at a time, one step at a time.
cognitive behavioural therapy helped me a lot when I felt similar emotions. give that a read?
you can’t be behind in your own life <3
Dear @kyo
Thank you for reaching out. Reading your post, I see that you are currently feeling overwhelmed and losing hope. Many of us have felt like these before at some point in our lives so please know you are not alone. There is hope that it will get better so do not be discouraged. Some suggestions to move forward are:
a)hold thoughts lightly, they may not be helpful or fully true. spend time to recharge and take stock of your achievements. Despite how tough it has been, acknowledge how far you have come.
b)speak to trusted family and friends and spend time with them, surround yourself with those who care.
c)learn relaxation techniques such as the one found on the national mindline website.
d)speak with a counsellor to address thinking patterns. You can call the national mindline at 1771 which operates 24/7 as a first step. They can refer you to resources too.
Are you safe right now? If you are feeling overwhelmed and unsafe please contact SOS immediately at 1767 or go to the A& E dept of your nearest hospital.
Your life is precious and you matter. Please seek help soon to reduce distress and improve your wellbeing. You are not alone in this journey, so tap on resources soon. 