Lately i’ve been noticing that I can’t really seem to focus and have been noticing that I have had constant self-destructive thoughts. Additionally, i’ve been more anxious lately. Wanted to know if there are any tips or tricks to manage these emotions better?
2 Likes
Hi there!!
Happy Monday and thank you for sharing your struggles openly with us here!
Awareness and penning down your thoughts and feelings is a really huge step already - before we dive into coping mechanisms, would you be able to share more about any trigger events or context about what you might be going through at the moment? 
In the meantime, I’ve personally found that verbalizing to people in my support system (whether it’s my friends/this community here) helps me organize my thoughts; journaling also helps tremendously in taking stock of reality vs perception.
For example, sometimes we are unable to focus or experience anxiety because everything seems to have equal importance and we need to attend to them at the same time. But it’s usually not true we can write things down or sound it out to someone to better visualize these things and assign priority and things feel more manageable instantly!
Let me know if you tried this and if it helped, otherwise, I’m here to listen
2 Likes
Definitely see a professional. One thing i learnt is to not identify with those intrusive thoughts. As for anxiousness, find the root and solve it part by part. Exposure therapy and CBT helps
2 Likes
Hey @user7902, thanks so much for being open and reaching out, it really takes strength to notice these changes and want to do something about it 
From what you shared, it sounds like you’ve been feeling overwhelmed, struggling to focus, and dealing with a lot of anxious and self-destructive thoughts. That must be really exhausting to carry around day to day. I want you to know you’re not alone, and these feelings, though scary, are valid and something many people go through too.
Maybe you can try writing down your thoughts once a day or even recording voice notes. This can help offload all that’s swirling in your mind and give you a bit more space to breathe and focus.
And if the anxiety gets intense, grounding techniques like 5-4-3-2-1 (naming 5 things you see, 4 things you can touch, etc.) or simply splashing cold water on your face or doing deep belly breaths can help bring you back to the present.
You are not alone in this 
2 Likes
Dear @user7902
Thank you for reaching out. May I assure you that’s a good first step you have taken. I can sense you have good self awareness and are mindful that you are experiencing heightened anxiety, difficulties in focus and self destructive thoughts. Please know that you are not alone and what you’re feeling can be overcome.
Just like what @CharmingAnt has shared, grounding techniques can help to keep you in the present moment. Journaling too, helps to record what you are experiencing and process the feelings arising.
I also encourage you to approach a trusted mentor, family member or a counsellor who will listen to you with compassion and without judgement. Making connection in this way is also a form of support.
May I gently encourage you to be kind to yourself too. You’re dealing with much right now. It’s okay if you’re not at full energy or focus. Even the smallest things such as eating something, stepping outside for a few minutes, or taking a breath is a good self care activity to do.
And one thing I request you can consider to remember is:
Thoughts are just thoughts and they’re not the truth.
Your mind might tell you scary or negative things, but that doesn’t mean those thoughts are real or accurate. Especially when we’re anxious, the mind can spin stories that feel true but they are not. You are so much more than the doubts, fears, or harsh self-talk that the mind is churning out. You’re doing your best in a really difficult moment, and that is commendable.
Please know that you’re not alone, and that things will become more bearable with time and support. Focus can be rebuilt with consistency and practice. You deserve peace, healing, and to feel okay again. Remember to reach out here for support whenever needed.
2 Likes
Hey @user7902 thanks so much for sharing how you’re feeling. It sounds really tough to be dealing with constant self-destructive thoughts and increased anxiety, that takes a lot of courage to acknowledge. It’s completely understandable that your focus would be affected when your mind is feeling this overwhelmed.
One thing that might help is trying to ground yourself when things feel intense. Simple techniques like deep breathing, grounding exercises (like noticing five things you can see, hear, or touch), or even journaling your thoughts can sometimes create a little bit of space. Also, if you feel comfortable, talking to a trusted friend, family member, or a mental health professional could provide support tailored specifically to you.
Remember, it’s okay to take things one step at a time and be gentle with yourself. You’re not alone in this.
2 Likes
Hey @user7902,
Thanks for reaching out and being open about your situation~
There are some tips and tricks that have been helping me quite well whenever I get anxious or have negative thoughts, I can suggest them here! Of course you don’t have to take them in if you feel it doesn’t fit you 
-
Breathing in and out deeply helps me to stay present. Personally I do this activity slowly because I know slowing down emotionally regulates the bodies nervous system. I breathe in~, then breathe out~
-
Journalling helps me to understand my emotions and myself better, e.g why am I feeling like this, what happened that caused this, is this something I can solve or something I need to sit with and be okay with it? What can I do?.. It’s also very grounding for me, it’s like I can vent out all the stress of the day, and sometimes I like to add some plans for the next day so that I am mentally recharged and prepped for the next day (everyone journals differently this is just how I like to do it~🍃)
-
Finding a quiet space where I can reflect and meditate. For me its often a spot near nature, like a bench where I can just reflect and breath, most of the time I do this myself so that I can gather my thoughts. I like to journal whilst I do this too, helps me to ground, be present, and understand myself and form better clarity
-
Meeting up with people who can coach me/ help me/ listen to my problems. I find this very good too for me as talking to others can give me different perspectives in situations, can widen my horizons, and at the same time bond and form stronger connections ~
These are all the things that have been doing me well, I hope these suggestions might be of any guidance? But if none of them fit you that’s okay too~
Take it one step at the time and breathe. Be gentle on yourself and take care yeah? Much hugs and gentleness🍃
2 Likes
hey hey. It’s good to recognise where the anxiety and destructive thoughts are coming from. Grounding and relaxation helps to reduce symptoms initially but need to follow up with deeper exploration of the underlying mechanisms. Try youtubing belly breathing exercises, or have a set of alternative thoughts to repeat to yourself when faced with negative ones. Those help too. Remember to stay connected to friends and family, trusted individuals. Stay active. Sleep and eat well. You’re ok
2 Likes