i feel disgusted with myself recently. my dad’s in jail until i get into form 1, my mom’s barely here and i feel like an ungrateful brat. i have problems with my friends and i don’t know what to do. i also touch myself to stuff and i regret everything after. theres nobody to talk with and i feel about harming myself again. 
Hey @user0666 from what you’ve shared I can tell that you’re going through a lot right now. Not having your parents by your side, coupled with friendship problems — you’ve had to carry so much alone, thank you for pushing through thus far.
It’s not your fault, man. It’s not your fault your dad is in jail. It’s not your fault your mom isn’t by your side. It’s not your fault that you feel lost in navigating the problems in your friendships. Please know that these things are not within your control, and you should not blame yourself over them.
Being hurt isn’t your fault. You deserve to get the necessary help and support from people around you. If you’re open to it, please have a chat with your school counsellor. Alternatively, you can call the National Mindline at 1771, or their WhatsApp messaging service at 6669 1771. They will listen to your problems and can better help your situation, given their expertise and resources. If you want a listening ear, we can chat more here too.
Please remember that you don’t have to go through this alone! There are people here that can and will support you 
Hey @user0666. It really sounds like you’re stuck between so many painful and overwhelming places like your dad being in jail, your mom not being around, the tension with your friends, and it makes so much sense that you feel alone, lost, ashamed, or unsure of where to turn to.
But please hear this: please know that you’re not disgusting. You’re just someone who is trying to find some way to cope with all this pain. And even if some things make you feel regret after, it doesn’t mean you’re broken or bad, it just means you’re human and hurting. You’re still worthy of love and support.
Sometimes, when no one else seems safe or available, the pain turns inward. But please know that you don’t deserve to be hurt. You deserve care, compassion, understanding, and that you are not too much or too broken.
You are not your urges, your regrets, or your struggle. You’re someone who is in pain and trying to make sense of so many hard things. And your pain deserves support, not punishment or shame or silence.
And even now, you’re still here. Still holding on. Still reaching out. Still fighting for a version of yourself that feels freer than this. That’s brave.
If you’re ever in a place where things feel too heavy to hold, please remember there are people, school counselors, helplines, even us here, who want to help. You don’t have to do this all alone.
Instead of blaming yourself, maybe gently ask: What’s the deeper need I’m trying to soothe or escape from when I feel this way?
One step at a time, okay?
May you meet yourself with a little more gentleness than judgment today, and that you find the courage to reach for the support you were always worthy of 
What is Form 1? Never heard of that term b4
Hi @user0666 / OP,
It sounds like you’re carrying an overwhelming weight right now - between your dad being in jail, your mom’s absence, and feeling disconnected from your friends, it’s no wonder you’re feeling lost and alone. You’re trying to make sense of everything while also battling guilt and regret, especially around things you do in private that leave you feeling ashamed. It’s okay to feel conflicted and even angry at yourself, but that doesn’t make you a bad person - it makes you someone who’s hurting and trying to cope. I hear how isolated you feel, and how the pain is pushing you toward thoughts of self-harm again. You don’t deserve to go through this alone. Would it be okay if we talked more about what’s been happening with your friends or what kind of support you wish you had right now?
Note: If you need to speak to a professional in a time of crisis, you may WhatsApp the National Mindline at +65 6669 1771.
Best regards,
Han_Solo_2000
Befriender | let’s talk by mindline
Hi @user0666 , thank you for sharing and being so honest about your struggles. It feels like you are going through a lot right now. I think it’s a really brave step forward for yourself to share about how you are feeling. All of this must be such a heavy burden to carry everyday but please know that you don’t have to face all of this alone! Just like what @crispycreme and @Han_Solo2000 said, there is help readily available💗
During times like these, I know it’s really easy to succumb to feelings of self-hatred and guilt but know that it is also the time when you need the most love and kindness❤️🩹It wouldn’t hurt to be more understanding towards yourself, given all that you’re going through. You also deserve credit for getting through each day and continuing to push forward even though it’s so difficult. You deserve to be kind to yourself kayyy❤️
I hope this lightened the burden for you even if it’s just a little 
Feel free to share more, it’s a safe space and we’re here to listen 
hey user0666
your words, the way you just put them out here, it felt heavy…
you called yourself an ungrateful brat… but from here, it doesn’t sound like someone who doesn’t care. sounds more like someone who’s been carrying too much with too little help. dad’s in jail, mum’s not around much, and friends aren’t really friends right now. you’re not being dramatic. that’s a lot.
the part about touching yourself and then regretting it… its clear that something in you is trying to cope in secret but gets punished by your own thoughts after. maybe you’re not trying to be bad. maybe you’re just trying to feel… not empty.
and the self-harm thoughts, when those come up, is it more like wanting to stop the guilt, or stop everything?
Hello @user0666 I’m really sorry you’re going through so much right now. It sounds incredibly overwhelming, with your dad being in jail, your mom not really being around, and feeling like you have no one to talk to. That’s a lot for anyone to carry, and I want you to know you’re not alone in this, even if it feels like it.
You’re not an ungrateful brat. You’re a human being in pain, trying to make sense of everything. It’s okay to feel lost. That doesn’t make you bad. It just means you’re struggling, and struggling doesn’t make you any less deserving of care or support.
If you’re having thoughts of hurting yourself again, please don’t keep that to yourself. You matter, and your safety matters. Talking to someone like a school counselor, a trusted adult, or a mental health professional can really help.
And if you ever need someone to talk to, even just to let things out, I’m here. There are others who care too. You’re not as alone as your mind might make you feel.
Please hang in there. Even if it’s hard to believe right now, things can get better. You’re stronger than you think, and you deserve peace, support, and healing.