I’m 22 I’ve not had any single meaningful accomplishments, my social skills are horrible I have so much anxiety and I spent most on my days lying in bed and thinking about how big of a loser and disgrace I am. I haven’t had any relationships or experience, I can tell that no one respects me and whenever someone tells me I need to do this I get super angry and feel even more depressed and ashamed of myself. I do try to get out of my comfort zone I attend social gatherings I try my best to contribute but every time my energy gets drained and I start comparing and judging myself , why can’t I socialise as well as them , I don’t understand what their saying and I can’t contribute at all. What is wrong with me everyone is so much better than me I can’t do simple tasks I’m such a failure why did god create me he made a mistake how do I even continue when I know that I will never improve or gain respect from others
Hi @presentfinch8208! It sounds like things have been weighing on you and it is exhausting. The gap between wanting to connect and feeling like you’re failing at it every time, that’s a painful place to be stuck in.
I want to gently push back on one thing though: you’re describing yourself as someone who doesn’t try, but that’s not what I’m reading. You show up to social gatherings even when it drains you. You try to contribute. You’re clearly thinking hard about your life and what you want it to look like. That’s not nothing .. that’s actually quite hard to do when you’re feeling this low.
But I’m also concerned about some of what you’ve shared, the days spent in bed, the feeling that you’re a mistake, wondering how you continue. That’s more than just low confidence or social anxiety. That sounds like real suffering, and it deserves real support, not just advice. Can I ask, have you ever spoken to a counsellor, therapist, or doctor about how you’re feeling? Alternatively, you can always reach out to one at national mindline at 1771 via call or WhatsApp them at 66691771.