i validated my own emotions by myself (and actually feeling that validation in my BONES), communicated well and set healthy boundaries with this person, and i’m okay with any outcome that comes my way because things will always work out eventually. i still have a long way to go to work on myself, but i’m happy with the progress i have made.
it seems like such a small feat when i type this out, but it’s been so long since i’ve felt at peace with myself. like, i genuinely believe that my brain has become so much more fogged up due to the immense stress and worry. this lowered my self-esteem towards my intelligence even more. i’m already a rather slow person when it comes to my processing speed and i’ve been feeling even slower than usual…
this situation drained me so much for almost a year and being someone who was able to just detach/cut someone off when necessary….. i couldn’t with this one person and i’m so happy that i have finally reached this stage and it is so freeing. it kept feeling like i have all these tools to help myself and i know what to do to make myself feel better, but my heart hasn’t caught up. now, i feel like they are somewhat aligned.
i’m finally out of the jail (a little) i had put myself in… it will take time but i will get there
Hi @tophu that is amazing to hear! Finding the courage to set healthy boundaries with others is not easy, I’m glad to hear that you have managed to take the first daring step in prioritising your own mental wellness.
Hey @tophu. Wow, this is powerful to read! You’ve done something incredibly brave, not just emotionally, but mentally and spiritually. To validate yourself, to set boundaries, and reach a space for peace after so long… all of that takes immense courage and strength. And yes, I am really glad that you’re proud of yourself, you should be!
Even more, I love how you acknowledged the gap between “knowing” and “feeling”, and how it’s finally starting to align. That’s something a lot of us struggle with, and the fact that you noticed that shift shows how deeply you’ve been reflecting and growing. That kind of self-awareness and patience speaks volumes about the work you’ve been doing.
You’re not just surviving anymore, you’re reclaiming yourself, one step at a time.
As you continue this journey, what are some things that are helping you stay grounded in this freedom you’ve created?
Thank you for sharing this light. Truly.
May you continue blooming at your own pace, in your own time, and in your own way
That’s the spirit! After a prolonged period of lamenting (in years) and pouring out all my regrets, I feel as though a burden has been lifted off my head. What you did is necessary for better health. Keep going!
Hi @tophu that’s great to hear and I’m so happy for you too!! I think it takes a lot of courage and strength to sit with a feeling and accept it as well as standing firm to set boundaries. It is no small feat! It’s great to look back on how far you’ve come and give credit to yourself for your efforts and also appreciate all the support that you’ve received along this journey.
I’m super proud of you and I hope you can look back on this win in the future to motivate yourself when encountering any hard times progress isn’t linear so any time you feel lost from this path(which is completely normal!!), just know that you can always find yourself back and return to this peaceful state of mind
hii @tophu , im super proud of you too!! it’s definitely really hard to speak up for yourself, and do things which are out of your comfort zone; and im happy that you decided to take this super scary step for yourself :3 i hope that with this, your self esteem will eventually rise again, and you’ll feel a lot better!! keep it up girl :>
so proud of you OP, this isn’t a small feat at all!! genuinely happy for you that you’re finding peace after almost a year of emotional weight Keep going rooting for ya
Im so, so, so happy for you! I can hear your happiness through your post, and i would like to affirm you!
It’s for sure not easy to identify your feelings and set clear boundaires. Im so glad that you took the first step towards self growth. It is truly so inspiring to hear about your story. Thank you for sharing it with us
Hi @tophu it’s really great to hear how much progress you’ve made and how you’re starting to feel more at peace. Setting boundaries and validating yourself takes a lot of strength.
Feeling foggy after so much stress is totally normal, but you’re moving forward and that’s what counts. It’s awesome that your heart and mind are starting to align, that’s real healing. Keep being kind to yourself. You’re doing great, and it’s okay if it takes time. You’ve got this!
Hi @tophu, it’s heartening to know that you’ve made significant positive progress in your personal endeavour! =)
It must have been a challenging period of struggling, learning and growing. I just want to let you know that we’re proud of you for this progress achievement! (:
It’s a great distinction you made between what your mind knows and what your heart feels. It usually takes a longer time for the heart to catch up with what the mind already knows and we’re happy that you recognise this process and time-difference.
Thank you for giving your self-compassion and it’s posts like this that enliven our community too, thank you for sharing your journey and we’ll be rooting for you! ^^
Thank you for sharing, that is really nice to know that you are mentally in a better place. I am sure your words will encourage others that are quietly going through similar situations.
Writing and publishing things here can also benefit yourself, as you can always come back here and remind yourself of what you have gone through and what you have achieved.
aww this made me so happy to read !! what you described isn’t a small feat at all – it’s massive. validating your own emotions, setting boundaries, detaching from someone who drained you for so long… that takes so much strength, awareness, and inner work.
i’m SO proud of you for doing the work, and for reaching this stage. you deserve every bit of the freedom and clarity that’s coming your way
been following your story for a while now, @tophu! glad you managed to work things out. we’re all proud of you too and will continue to be here to listen and support you whenever you need us!
“Wow, thank you so much for sharing all of this. I can really hear how much strength, reflection, and hard work went into getting to where you are right now. It’s honestly no small feat—being able to validate your own emotions, set boundaries, and feel that inner alignment between your heart and mind? That’s huge
It sounds like this journey has been incredibly draining and heavy, especially having held onto it for almost a year. And yet, you’ve come through with so much clarity, even peace. That fog lifting even a little bit is such a big deal. I really want to acknowledge how hard it can be when your brain feels slow or heavy.
hii @tophu! I am so happy for you. I remember replying to one of your previous posts about the relationship you were trying to heal from, and you have definitely progressed a looong way since then. Please keep going forward in your journey of self discovery! We are here for you take care!
Wow, this is such a huge moment for you, and it’s amazing to see you acknowledge all the progress you’ve made. It sounds like you’ve done a lot of internal work, and that’s not easy, especially when dealing with a situation that’s been weighing on you for so long. The fact that you’ve not only validated your own emotions but also set boundaries and allowed yourself to feel at peace with your decisions speaks volumes about your growth. It’s incredible that you’ve found that sense of freedom, even if it’s just the start—it’s still a big deal.
I get what you mean about feeling like it’s a small feat on paper, but it’s actually massive when you consider the emotional work involved. It’s like lifting a weight off your shoulders, especially when you’ve felt stuck in a situation for so long. The feeling of having your heart and mind finally catch up with each other? That’s a game-changer.
And the thing about being slower or feeling foggy in your brain? Totally understandable, especially after such a draining experience. Stress can really mess with your mental clarity and make you question your own abilities, but you’ve proven that you’re capable of so much more than that. Healing and growth aren’t always linear, but what you’ve done here is significant.
It might not always feel like it, but this peace you’re finding with yourself is huge. Celebrate that progress. How are you feeling about the next steps now that you’ve hit this point? Do you think there are any specific things you’d like to focus on as you continue this journey?
It’s great to look back on how far you’ve come and give credit to yourself for your efforts and also appreciate all the support that you’ve received along this journey.
progress isn’t linear so any time you feel lost from this path(which is completely normal!!), just know that you can always find yourself back and return to this peaceful state of mind 
I hope you will continue to celebrate small wins, rooting for you OP 
