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Hi, it’s been quite a while since I’ve been on here, about four months, I think. I’ve been doing fairly well, continuing my counselling sessions and building some routine with a part-time job. But lately, I’ve been feeling very stressed, upset, frustrated, and anxious. I really need some help processing this.

Over the past three weeks, my dad has been pushing me more about my future and getting a full-time job. He’s been sending me lots of links to job ads and websites, and nearly every conversation ends up being about my future plans. This has led to many uncomfortable moments and arguments. Recently, I even attended an e2i interview session at his request even though I wasn’t ready — it triggered a small panic attack (I’m okay now).

I do understand that he’s worried about me and my future, but the way he approaches it makes me even more stressed, upset, and reluctant to share my thoughts with him. Because he’s often very pushy and condescending, I’ve found myself avoiding or ignoring him — which just makes him angrier. When he gets upset, he yells, and it creates a vicious cycle. I feel so angry and scared of him that I’m starting to resent him.

My mum is also worried about me, but she’s gentler and easier to talk to. Unfortunately, she’s getting caught in the middle of our arguments, and I don’t want her to get hurt or stuck between us. What can I do to manage this situation?

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Hey @10_CYc13s ,

Thank you for sharing all these on the platform. I’m glad to hear that you’re coping better with your part-time job and counselling sessions. Great job!

I also hear that you’re having some issues with your father, and his constant questionings about your future plans and job has made you feel more stressed and anxious, and you’re worried about your mother who’s caught in the middle. I think what could help may be to have a deep conversation with your father on this. It could help you understand where your father is coming from, and at the same time, it could also give you an opportunity to explain to your father your point of view and how his actions is making you feel. If you and your mother are alright, she could also help mediate the conversation. Would you be open to trying that?

Remember that you’re not alone in this and we’re here for you if you need someone to talk to :heart:

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Dear @10_CYc13s

Thank you for reaching out here and sharing what you are experiencing. May I acknowledge the effort you’ve been making. Continuing counselling and building routine with a part-time job is real progress, even if things feel overwhelming again right now.

It is understandable that you are feeling stressed, upset and frustrated with your dad’s strong push for you to secure a full time job. I can see that you have already been taking steps towards your job search but it has been a challenging.

Do bring up to your counsellor on your dad’s way of “pushing” for you to take actions. This situation is exactly what therapy can help with, including managing anxiety, setting boundaries, and navigating family conflict. You are not behind in life, and you don’t have to force yourself into readiness before you’re actually ready.

Do continue to reach out whenever needed, and know that you are not alone. :yellow_heart:

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Hello, thank you for sharing. I understand that it can be overwhelming in this job serach. I can see that your dad might be asking as a means to show concern and perhaps you can tell him your perspective. rooting for you op <3

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Hey @10_CYc13s, it’s great to hear that you’re doing well and managed to build a routine that works for you! :slight_smile: I hear that there is an evident strain in the relationship you have with your father and I know that can be overwhelming to deal with. I hope you know that it is okay to set boundaries and take life at your own pace. If he truly wishes to motivate you, I believe that he should do so in a more encouraging manner instead of adding on to the many things already on your plate! In situations like this where there is no 1 right answer, I believe you can try some coping techniques to manage your emotions before/after a conversation with him. It is normal to feel anger towards him, but I hope that you are able to find a healthy coping mechanism to deal with that anger. Since you stated that it’s easier to speak to your mom, I hope you are able to share your worries with her too instead of keeping it to yourself. Keep your head up! :hugs: