another rant because im in my feels right now.
i always feel like im never going to be able to find love in this life. the romantic kind, not the platonic/familial kind.
i just dont feel like i have anything desireable about myself that people would be interested in. i would consider myself to just be average. i look plain, i think i have a basic or bland personality, im not really funny, i just generally do ok. i dont really have anything special, so to speak.
plus, nowadays, with more exposure to social media, people are making me lose hope. so many people are so disgusting in the way they behave or their way of thinking/morals. it somehow seems impossible to find someone who’s not racist, misogynistic, pushy, short-tempered/angry all the time. you know, like when you read comments on an ig reel and its like…what are these people saying…? or when you’re at school or in public and you hear some people saying the most racist or uncomfortable thing in the world, and the whole group just laughs like its funny when its really not (especially when talking about women…).
all of these combined just make me feel like i’ll just die alone or something. on some days, i’m able to come to terms with the thought of never experiencing romantic love, but on others it makes me have a breakdown. i’m still kind of young (i guess) so most people i confide in just tell me that i have to wait and everything will fall into place but i just find it really hard to belive.
thanks for reading.