Overthinking about the present and future

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I am 25 years old, I always tend to overthink about stuff that I am about to do. When I was 16 years old, I was granted an opportunity to study in Australia. After arriving for a few days, I was unable to cope with the anxiety plus kept overthinking and return to SG. And at the present, I was granted another opportunity to study in Australia again but I am having difficulties to cope about myself. I keep overthinking about the future like if I go to Australia, will I be able to look a job to cover my daily expenses or if I am at there now, what will my parents do if I am not here with them. They are getting older and I am afraid if I don’t stay with them, I will lost those memories with them. But after debating for so long, in my heart I really want to go but on final decision that I decided to go. I will think what will happen in the future(but haven’t actually happen) and will I be able to get a part time job or will my expenses be enough for me and more, that causes me to go repeat again and again with my decision. But I am scared if I let go this opportunity, I will regret it later. I am scared that my relatives will think me as a loser in life, as I getting all sorts of elder “talks” for them. I am facing difficulties in sleeping and eating. Sometimes after finishing my lunch and dinner, I felt the urge to vomit and would need to do something else to get it off my mind. For sleep, I mostly can’t sleep and will take a long time to sleep because I keep overthinking. I felt like someone is in my brain talking. I was facing this alone, I am afraid to let my family knows about this as my family don’t understand me. I need to wear a “ happy” face whenever I was with them and my relatives. But after staying in my room alone, I tend to get sad and cry a bit. I was facing suicidal thoughts before, thinking if I am dead probably I don’t need to suffer so much. What should I do?

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Hi @EthanLi

Firstly, thank you for choosing to share your feelings and thoughts here on this platform. I want to say that you are really brave and courageous for taking the step to be authentic and vulnerable here, and I commend you for that. Your feelings of anxiety, regret and concerns about your future, judgement from others around you, feeling stuck, and worrying about your parents – all of them are completely valid; I would feel the same way if I were you too.

But I’m really glad you reached out to talk about what you’re going through. It sounds like you’re dealing with a tremendous amount of stress, anxiety, and overwhelming thoughts, and I want you to know that you don’t have to carry this burden alone. I’m here to support you.

For starters, I would like to encourage you to with some suggestions:

• Seek Professional Help: Do reach out to a mental health professional, such as a therapist or counselor as they are trained to provide guidance and support for individuals facing anxiety, overthinking, and other mental health challenges. They can definitely work with you to develop coping strategies and provide a safe space to express your feelings. You can also try these online options if you can’t travel much:

  1. Limitless : Talk To Someone - Limitless
  2. CPH chat : https://www.cphonlinecounselling.sg/hc/en-us
  3. IMH CHAT : https://www.imh.com.sg/CHAT/Pages/default.aspx
  4. ec2.sg : https://fycs.org/ec2-sg

• Talk to Someone You Trust: While it’s understandable that you feel the need to wear a “happy” face around your family and relatives, confiding in someone you trust can be incredibly relieving. You can try sharing your struggles with a close friend or family member who can provide you with emotional support.

• Focus on Self-Care: Self-care practices to help manage your anxiety and improve your overall well-being. This includes getting regular exercise, maintaining a balanced diet, practicing relaxation techniques like deep breathing or mindfulness, and ensuring you get enough sleep. For example, you can try these activities to help you while focusing on self-care:

• Challenge Negative Thoughts: I encourage you to work on challenging the negative thoughts and fears that are causing you distress. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) techniques can be helpful in identifying and changing unhelpful thought patterns. One simple activity you can try: Mental Support & Wellbeing Resources in Singapore to Improve Your Mental Health | mindline.sg

Last but not least, I’m very worried about your experiences of suicidal thoughts.
This is a serious concern, and it’s crucial to reach out for help immediately. You can contact a crisis helpline or speak to a mental health professional who can provide immediate assistance and support.

If you ever feel overwhelmed or are in immediate danger, please reach out to a crisis hotlines:

All in all, please know that seeking help is a sign of strength, and it’s okay to ask for support when you’re going through a difficult time. We’re all here to support you through this season.
Please take care and keep us updated.

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Thank you @cottonsoul . Will definitely do these steps.

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Hi!
You may not be aware, but the things that you are worried/overthinking about are the stuff that you can control! You are in charge of this! You have an opportunity to study in Australia, do you have extra savings that can tide you over if you cant find a part time job there? Or, are there portals that can assist International students like yourself to get a PT job while studying?
As for parents, you can videocall them often, ask a neighbour to look out for them, any siblings?

I know you probably do not wanna hear me giving you solutions but hey, I am trying to let you realise you are in charge of your life and dont let the negative/overthinking take over. Try and access the situation calmly and hope you find a way out :slight_smile:

Also, do seek professional help, they might help with your overthinking and other negative thoughts.

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Let us know how you’re coping ok? and also keep us updated if you’ve managed to reach out for any support. Remember @EthanLi - You’re not alone :slight_smile: