Tired of everythingi

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I’m so tired of everything and I’m only 14. I have been struggling with my mental health since when I was 9-10 years old. Skipping school because of bullying. It only got worse when I was 11-12. I started having family problems too. I flunked my PSLE because of that . Just a few days before secondary school started, I saw my dad raping my mum while she was asleep. I have avoided my dad since then. I can barely go to the toilet in my house when it’s sitted up or forget about the incident everytime I see tissues at the side of my parents bed.Ever since that incident, I find myself stuttering and my social skills at level 0. At secondary one, I was struggling alot . Making friends and recently diagnosed with epilepsy. Doctor’s says there was no cause but I was lying to the doctors, saying that I wasn’t stress everytime before every seizure.

Now I’m in secondary 2. Lately I have been feeling horrible. I keep remembering the same incident even more and I am struggling with my academics as well as social interactions. I am a very awkward and quite person. Though I have two close friends, I don’t trust them enough to tell them this. Every day, I’m wondering when will all my misery end. When will someone will finally noticed the signs? I can’t get help with parental consent and I have been using tinkle friend but it’s been useless Thanks for listening to my rant.

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Dear @user306828,

It’s clear that you’ve been carrying a lot for a long time and what you described is serious. I want you to know you’re not wrong for saying it here, and you’re not going to get into trouble for speaking up.

The way you avoid your dad and certain parts of the house makes sense. It looks like you’re trying to stay safe and avoid any consequences. When you depend on the same adults at home, staying quiet can feel like the only option. That doesn’t mean you’re weak. It means you’re protecting yourself the only way you know how.

What happened has clearly affected you. The memories, the stress, seizures, the changes in how you talk or socialise and these are common trauma responses. Your body has been on alert for a long time.

Using Tinkle Friend was actually a positive step. It shows you’re trying to get support. But what you’re dealing with needs more than online chats. This forum isn’t enough on its own.

I need to ask, have you told any adult in real life? A teacher, school counsellor, relative, or someone you trust even a little? And have you been able to check whether your mum is safe?

If you haven’t told anyone yet, I understand why. But this is not something you should handle alone. The most important next step is to speak to your school counsellor face to face as soon as you can. School counsellors are trained to support you in handling situations like this and have a responsibility to protect students. So it is important that you reach out to them about safety concerns.

Please prioritise that conversation.

You also said you wonder when your misery will end. I need to check, are you having thoughts about hurting yourself or ending your life? Should you ever feel unsafe, call 999. You can also contact National Mindline 1771 or SOS 1767. These services are there for young people.

Right now, focus on one step: speak to your school counsellor as soon as possible.
You shouldn’t be dealing with this on your own.

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I have not told anyone about else about this yet. The rape incident? Once to a friend but it wasn’t the full story and it was not ever talked again last year. No, don’t worry I don’t intend on commiting suicide.I can’t talk to the school counselor without parental consent

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Hey @user306828,

Thank you for answering clearly.

I’m glad to hear you’re not intending to commit suicide. That’s important. If that ever changes, you need immediate help. For now, we focus on making sure you’re supported properly.

You told one friend a small part before. That shows you did try. When it wasn’t talked about again, it makes sense that you decided to keep it to yourself. Sometimes staying quiet feels more manageable than risking things getting complicated.

About the school counsellor, many students believe parental consent is always required. When it comes to safety concerns, especially involving possible abuse or harm at home, schools have safeguarding responsibilities. You are allowed to approach the school counsellor directly. You do not need to give full details immediately. You can simply say:

“I need help with something serious happening at home.”

That is enough to begin. If you truly cannot access the counsellor, then speak to:

  • Your form teacher or trusted subject teacher
  • Year principal or discipline master

You can also contact:

  • MSF Child Protective Service: 1800-777-0000
  • National Mindline: 1771

When a young person reports possible sexual violence or unsafe conditions at home, child protection processes apply. That means safety concerns are taken seriously even if parents are involved in the situation.

I also want to ask calmly, does your mum seem physically safe right now? You don’t need to confront anyone. Just whether she appears safe.

The way you’ve been handling this, staying quiet, avoiding your dad, keeping information limited, shows you’re trying to prevent fallout. That’s understandable. But this situation requires adult involvement beyond online support. This forum is not enough on its own.

The next step is practical:
Go to school. Ask to see the counsellor. If that feels blocked, request to speak privately to your form teacher and state that you need help with a serious home matter.

You don’t have to explain everything in one go. Just start the conversation.

You shouldn’t be managing this alone.

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Mhm, she is safe. My parents relationship with each other is stable now, though my mum forces close proximity with my dad sometimes because it’s obvious that I ignore him. My dad also tries to call me cute pet names which disgusts me and I ignore it.

Anyways, as for the counsellor and my teachers, I’ll see how though. I’m not so courageous to approach anybody in person yet. Thanks for you advice

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