it’s hard to let him go but i don’t have a choice. 2 years going three years and for what? it’s so hard for me to sleep knowing that no one is going to say good mornings and good nights to me. i know it sounds needy but its been my morning and night routine for 2 years straight. i hate this, i hate everything. i have no motivation to eat. i feel like relapsing on selfharm again. all i wanted was to find someone who would stay….
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Hi @SparklyUnicorn,
I’m really sorry you’re going through this—breakups can be incredibly tough, especially after spending two years with someone who became such a big part of your life. It’s completely normal to miss those routines, like the good mornings and good nights, and it doesn’t make you “needy” at all. Those moments are part of what gave you comfort and connection, and it’s okay to feel the loss of that now.
It sounds like you’re feeling overwhelmed and unsure of how to handle everything, and I want to acknowledge how heavy that must feel. You mentioned feeling like you want to relapse into self-harm, and I want to gently remind you that there are healthier ways to cope with the pain you’re feeling. While it might seem like there’s no other option right now, reaching out for support can make a big difference, even if it feels hard.
Your emotions—whether it’s sadness, anger, or frustration—are valid. You’re going through a lot, and it’s okay to feel everything you’re feeling. It’s not about being “needy”; it’s about your heart healing from a deep hurt. Right now, it might be helpful to focus on small steps, like taking care of yourself in ways that feel manageable. That could mean finding a new routine or activity that brings some comfort, even if it’s something small like making yourself a cup of tea in the mornings.
I know you’re feeling like no one will stay, and that can be a lonely feeling. But you are deserving of love, care, and support, even if it doesn’t feel that way right now. There are people who care about you and want to help you through this. Would you consider talking to someone about how you’re feeling, whether it’s a friend, counselor, or someone else you trust?
@sparklyunicorn damn it doesnt sound needy to me its a reminder of love and I can see how that might be the same for you too 
it sucks that a long term relationship of 2 going 3 years just ended so suddenly and it must be very hurthful now too 
my previous relationship was also about 2 years and when it ended it was so sudden and it sucked so badly I can remember myself crying in the middle of the night outside my army bunk.
I would say don’t resort to self harm instead try the opposite. Take care of yourself by eating well, reconnecting with people and excercising. That was what kept me going and eventually found my current partner of 3 years going strong.
Overal i think whats important is to reconnect with yourself and find yourself again 
Its not easy for the first few months but take it easy step by step and you can get out of this 
Dont be afraid to share more too we are here for you
hi @sparklyunicorn, thank you for sharing, i’m sorry to hear that you are going through such a difficult thing, breakups are so painful and can mess with your daily life so much especially when you have been with the person for long and have a routine that revolves around them… i want to let you know that your feelings are completely valid and you are not wrong for feeling this way. feeling needy is very normal with what you are going through.
i know it’s hard to believe this but trust me that you will get better. allow yourself to grief and sit with all the feelings that come to you. over time, you will find that you have more days where you feel better, though you might have bad days too still. that’s normal and okay. i know that it’s hard, hard to eat, hard to even get up, especially at the start. but when you are able to, find something to do that makes you happy and helps you to relax, or engage in something that takes your mind off things. that helps a lot.
you will get better. you are loved, and you will find someone who will stay 