Am i normal

I feel sad and unappreciated in my marriage.
It feels like every single wrong is a grave mistake.
Even falling sick feels like a sin.
Sex has been absent and i been thrown out of the house before and was threaten again recently.
I feel sad is it normal?

Dear @MyApricotgigantic,

Thank you for coming here to share your struggles with us. I’m sorry to hear you’re feeling this way. :people_hugging: It’s completely normal to feel sad and unappreciated in a situation like this. When our efforts and feelings aren’t acknowledged or valued, especially by the people who are meant to show us love and care, it can deeply affect our emotional well-being. :orange_heart:

Your feelings of sadness are valid, especially when you’re dealing with so much, from being made to feel guilty for things beyond your control to experiencing threats and a lack of intimacy. It’s important to recognise that your emotions are a natural response to the way you’re being treated.

Remember, your self-worth and self-esteem come from within and shouldn’t depend on what others think or say. Feeling guilty for being sick or making mistakes usually means you’re being too hard on yourself. Guilt can be helpful if it teaches you something, but it’s not good if it makes you feel like you don’t deserve care and respect. We all deserve care and respect no matter what we did or did not do.

When you’re ready, please take some time to reassess how you’re treating yourself and how you’re allowing others to treat you. You deserve to feel safe, respected, and valued in your marriage. It might be helpful to talk to a trusted friend, family member, or a professional who can provide support and guidance. Focusing on self-care and setting boundaries can help you protect your energy and maintain a healthy self-esteem.
Here are some resources for you to reach out to if you’d like:

  • wayfinding tool - There is a variety of mental health services and resources in the community. Find the most appropriate service to meet your needs.

  • Singapore Association for Mental Health (SAMH) - 1800 283 7019, Mon - Fri: 9am - 6pm (excluding PH)

  • TOUCH Counselling Services - Tel: 6709 8401

  • WINGS Counselling Centre - Tel: 6383 5745

  • National Anti-Violence & Sexual Harassment Helpline (NAVH) - 1800-777-0000

You don’t have to go through this alone, support is available. :revolving_hearts: I hope the above has been helpful and if you’d like more resources or if there is anything else you’d like to share with us, please do. We’re here to listen to you, your feelings are valid and you matter! :grinning:

Take care,
Cool Breeze =)