My boss has been bullying me at work eg humiliate me in front of team etc. I threw the resignation letter and is serving notice. However she continue her antics eg privately calling external vendor i work with etc to cut me from working with them. Honestly i dont feel like turning for me and cos of the games she play, i am also constantly suspicious of her every act. Deep down, i cant believe the injustice and that she continue to make life difficult. How can i avoid work during this notice period as i dunno how i can survive thro the emtions constantly bugging me and made me ctry for no reason.
Hey @user5080
From what you have described, its clear you’ve been under siege for a long time. And yet, you chose to stand up. You resigned rather than let yourself be walked over. That itself shows courage, not many can face a bully, much less when the bully holds authority as your boss.
What you’re feeling now, suspicion of every act, crying without reason, the weight of injustice, it makes sense. Your body is reacting to constant harassment and no one should have to endure this. It’s valid that you want out, and heartening that you’ve already taken steps to protect yourself.
Bullies often act out of their own lack of esteem. Their behaviour reflects them, while we can’t always change how they behave, we can work on limiting how much of their behaviour impact us.
During this notice period, one way to give yourself some stability is to put things in writing rather than face her directly. If you feel safe, a factual email, recounting the incidents, while also naming the hurt, can help you release the weight without needing confrontation. That also gives you a record if things escalate.
You’ve already done the bravest part: choosing not to stay under abuse. Now the task is coping, one day at a time, ask yourself gently: today, do I have someone at work that I can trust to borrow courage to stay safe, or do I need to put boundaries in place? both are valid.
If ever the emotions get too heavy and you fear you cannot hold them, please reach out, MindLine 66691771, you can message or chat with a counsellor.
And if the harassment should escalate further, please document them and you can consider online reporting of workplace bullying and harassment in Singapore, you can use the Tripartite Alliance for Fair & Progressive Employment Practices (TAFEP) online portal to report incidents, with assistance available via phone at 6838 0969. You can also contact AWARE Singapore via their Workplace Harassment and Discrimination Advisory service (whda@aware.org.sg or 6777 0318) for support and advice,
For now, remember, you’ve already proven your strength by walking away. Maybe the next step is not to fight harder, but to hold space for your own healing as you close this chapter. Let us know how you feel?
Hi @user5080 I just want to say that I see you. It sounds like your boss hasn’t been very respectful, and that’s something you really deserve. The way she’s been acting has kind of put you on high alert almost? But that sounds really tiring for you. It makes sense that you feel like crying sometimes cos you’ve been through so much
How long is your notice? I hear that you’re trying to avoid work, and that can be really tricky. If you have to finish your notice, do you feel like that’s something you will be able to handle? And if not, what do you need to get through this?
I think some options on what to do next has been shared, that there is an option for formal support and action against your boss. Is that something you want to do? Even if it’s not that’s totally okay as well.
Hi @user5080, it seems like your boss is really treating you unfairly and its causing you a lot of emotional distress, that must be difficult to cope with. It’s completely understandable why you feel affected by this and you shouldn’t have to suffer from workplace bullying in silence. It’s great that you’ve taken the steps to get yourself out of this situation, that is something that takes a lot of courage to do. In the meantime, you may want to try creating a safe space for yourself at work by surrounding yourself with people that you trust, and if you can, it would also be helpful to document the bullying that you’re experiencing so you are able to report it if need be. Wishing you all the best!