I recently had to give up my dream of owning a pet because it was affecting my husband’s health. Deep down, I know it was the right thing to do—for both him and the pet—but that doesn’t make it any easier. The desire to have a pet hasn’t gone away, and honestly, it still hurts. It feels like I had to quietly let go of something that meant so much to me. I don’t regret the decision, but I’m still grieving the loss in my own way. Some days, it feels like I’ll never fully heal or get better. I guess I just needed to say this out loud somewhere.
Hey @rainyday
I hear how much giving up your dream of owning a pet has affected you, and it sounds like this decision, while made with love and for a good reason, has caused a deep emotional wound. It’s understandable that even though it was the ‘right’ choice, it doesn’t make the emotional loss any easier to carry.
You said you know this was the best choice for your husband and the pet, but you’re still grieving. Your sadness shows how much you valued and bonded with your pet, and that is never easy to forget nor forgo. Grieving doesn’t have a timeline, and it’s okay to feel like you’re not ‘better’ or ‘healed’ yet.
Give youself space to sit with these feelings and allow them to be present. Sometimes, when we’re caught between doing what is best for others and what we deeply desire, it can create a quiet pain that we carry with us. It’s okay to not be okay in this moment.
What I admire about you is your ability to consider the well-being of both your husband and the pet, even at the cost of something that meant so much to you. That takes a lot of selflessness, and it speaks to your ability to love and care for those around you, even if it comes with personal sacrifice. You’re showing resilience, even if it feels like you’re not moving forward as quickly as you would like.
I can understand that healing doesn’t happen overnight, and you might not feel ready to fully process this yet. You’ve mentioned that it still hurts, and that’s a sign that there’s still a lot of feeling to work through. I’d recommend taking small steps each day to allow yourself to grieve, whether it’s by remembering the good times or acknowledging the pain in quiet moments or allowing yourself to express how you’re feeling with someone you trust. But for now, if it helps, just being in this space of feeling is enough. Healing is not a race.
Though this is a tough chapter, remember that the grief you’re feeling is a reflection of the love and attachment you have to your dreams and your family. These feelings are valid, and they’re part of the process of healing too. You’re not alone in this, and over time, small moments of peace may begin to emerge. We are here to support you through it, no matter how long the process takes.
Take care..
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It must have took a lot of courage giving up your dream. I’m glad you were able to share this. I hope one day you can wake up, and you will realise you haven’t thought about this loss at all, and then you will realise you can move on.
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hi @rainyday ,
I’m really sorry to hear that you’re going through this. Giving up your dream of owning a pet must have been incredibly difficult, especially when it meant so much to you.
Healing takes time like what FuYuan has mentioned, and it’s okay to feel like you’re not fully better yet. If you ever want to talk more about it or need support, the community will always be here to listen 
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Hat off. Truly. 
What you did was incredibly selfless and mature. choosing your husband’s health and the pet’s well-being over your own dream takes a lot of love and strength. It shows how deeply you care, and what a thoughtful and responsible partner you are. 
If it ever feels right, maybe spending time with animals through volunteering could offer a bit of comfort. It’s not the same, I know… but sometimes even those small connections can bring a little light back in.
hug 
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Thank you all for your kind and thoughtful replies. I wasn’t sure what to expect when I posted, but your words have brought real comfort during a difficult time.
One of the hardest parts hasn’t just been the grief itself, but feeling judged by some family and friends for the decision we made. It’s something I still struggle with quietly. That’s why your understanding means even more — to be met with empathy instead of criticism reminded me that compassion still exists, even if it doesn’t always come from the people closest to us.
I’m truly grateful for the space this community holds. Thank you for helping me feel a little less alone.
Hey rainy day!
I am a pawrent of 2 fur babies. I totally resonate with you. I couldn’t imagine myself to give up my own pets but I guess for your situation, there is a certain degree of health constraints and owning a pet does come with huge responsibility and commitment.
To prioritise your family over something you truly love isn’t easy at all. I feel you 