disconnected

Im 15. This is a lil bit of a rant. i feel bored almost everyday. But there’s some weeks or days where I feel happy, like not very happy but just content with life. I feel really bored with life cus I don’t understand the point of success. They put us here with all this work to do just to graduate and do more work again. I just think that the goals set and achieved are useless and pointless. Im not tryna be deep but I honestly don’t feel anything most of the time other than anger. When I first joined my class now, I was extroverted and liked talking. It didn’t feel weird then but now i feel like I don’t even want to talk to the people around me and they are just used to me being extroverted and they talk to me. I don’t want them thinking there’s something wrong with me else they will bother me about it. I just want to stop talking to boring people. Recently I have expressed my open mindedness to places such as prison and mental health institute to my parents, saying that I find the free accommodation and food sounds good. They think im mad and have something wrong with me, they do not want to hear me out or get me help they just want to tell me im mad. I want to go to those places because they sound like escapes from reality. They are real places filled with real and interesting people. And I genuinely don’t think any of this is my fault. Genetics and environmental factors are the only things that contribute to one’s thinking and actions. Also I don’t think there’s a good or bad in the world, for that reason.

I really think im over exaggerating somethings cus im just a teenager and constantly exposed to social media. But I feel so disconnected from society, although I believe a lot of teenagers out there think like me though not expressing it like me. Please tell me if I should seek help for this or just stop over exaggerating and thinking

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Hi there, thank you for making the time to share your struggles with us.

I understand you! Sometimes I feel really apathetic towards life too. Some days I wonder what I’m working so hard for, why can’t I spend my days enjoying nature? Why do I have to work so hard for a man-made societal construct?

It’s completely normal to start thinking out of the box, to think beyond what schools are teaching you. I think the point of success may be different for everyone, some may feel complete getting married and starting a family, others may want to explore the world. It’s completely up to you to define your version of success!

When you said that places like prisons and mental health institutes had free accommodation and food, that’s true, but is that a place you’d like to stay in instead of your own personalised home? Is the food there something you want to eat day after day instead of being able to go out whenever you want to eat your favourite foods?

As for learning about interesting people who have been through their life journey, perhaps you could go to the library and read books on historical figures? learn about what they have done throughout the course of their life through their biographies? I can’t really give recommendations because I don’t read much about historical figures, but I’m sure there’s great recommendations online.

I think it’s completely normal that you’re thinking this way, and it’s good you’re wanting to find out more about the purpose of life, so explore those feelings and see what you can learn about yourself! I wish you all the best in your journey, and I hope you are able to find your own unique definition of success for yourself.

Hey @user2252,

I hear you. You’re stuck in this loop where school feels pointless, people expect you to be someone you’re not anymore, and even your parents seem to brush you off. It makes sense you’d feel angry and numb—like, ‘Why bother?’ When you talk about prisons or mental hospitals, it sounds like you’re craving a break from all the pressure, not that you’re ‘mad.’

You’re right that a lot of teens feel this way, but that doesn’t mean it’s ‘just’ anything. It’s real pain. The fact that you’re questioning whether to seek help tells me part of you knows this weight isn’t yours to carry alone. Would it help to explore what ‘help’ could look like—on your terms?"

Do you reckon that a school counsellor or anonymous helpline (e.g., youth chat) to start could help? You don’t have to figure this out today. Just know your voice matters.

Welcome to the rat race. Since u r studying subjects u r not interested in n dont earn mondy to reward urself from time to time, then its very hard. Once u r in a career or studying something u like, then it becomes better. U can also spend ur money earnt on things u like.

Imh stay wise, it was a nightmare to stay inside. No phone, no sane people, cant go out. Just eat n sleep n hope they release u.

U can find ur school counselor to talk about ur existentialism that is affecting ur mental health

Hey @user2252 thanks for sharing all this. I think it is normal at your age to think about what the meaning of life is — as you’re sharing all these thoughts, this is what came
up to me as the key thing you’re possibly trying to figure out at this point.

When you mention wanting to escape reality in places like prison or IMH, what I think you’re possibly hoping for is not to escape reality but to see what is out there in the world besides school right now. And places like prison and IMH do not necessarily show you what it is that you seek.

On the flip side, I wonder if there are any activities (eg sports, music, art, writing) that you like to do? Books that you like to read? Places you would like to explore? I see you as someone who is inquisitive and perhaps exploring what your interests may be outside of school work may bring you closer to the answers you are looking for. Social media consumption can also be draining when used excessively, as there is a lot of information overload. I would suggest using it moderately if possible.

I hope this helps. Take care!

Dear @user2252 ,

I hear you - the endless cycle of loops that school can feel like. You’re certainly not alone in this. Singapore’s rigorous education system puts lots of stress and emphasises alot on academic work.

Sometimes, a sign of spacing out, feeling anger etc, might be a sign of burn out. Underneath it all, you’re still you. I believe that you’ll find your spark back. Perhaps you can try to find interesting hobbies or connecting with nature more. There are lots of good things in life that you’ve yet to discover or already discovered - you just need to realise it :slightly_smiling_face:. Hang on, you got this!

Hello @user2252

Thank you for sharing something really relatable. I personally don’t think you’re mad, I think you’re just really bored with the way your life is right now. Hearing how you want to go to jail or check in into a psychiatric ward sounds like you yearn to change your environment.

Just a thought though, even if you were to be able to change your environment, after awhile wouldn’t you feel bored too in that new environment? It’s worse when you won’t be able to leave freely or on your own free will.

Instead I would encourage you and challenge you to find and do something differently. I think when people wants to make a change, they always feel it has to be drastic but sometimes it can be small tweaks. Try to find something to enhance your routine like maybe volunteering or find / explore a new hobby.

I hope that you find something that suits you. In the meantime, take care! :slight_smile:

I feel you♡

Singapore’s education system can feel stifling at times, because it emphasizes the burning question of “why should I study so hard if its just going to end like XXX”. Expressing the feelings of resentment and frustration and not feeling fulfilled in the system is completely valid.

But places like IMH and Prison are not exactly pleasant places to escape to, isn’t it? Those are institutions with their own functions and uses. As a student, wouldn’t it feel better to invest your time in places that benefit your development better? Such as community volunteering perhaps?

It sounds like you’re feeling trapped, I think its good that you’re making the effort to think beyond what the system has to offer. There’s many niche topics and hobbies outside that could provide you some excitement.Like crocheting, volunteering with Youthcorp, cycling or even learning how to craft ceramic pieces.

It’s normal to want to escape the system, but doing it in a healthy way is important too, I hope this helps!
It’ll be okay, I know it seems suffocating now but give yourself some time and Im sure things will work out in its own way, okay? Don’t be too hard on yourself.
Take care :heart: