Having fear over unrealistic bad scenarios

Ask a Therapist Coping
1

More than 9 years ago, while I was working at my previous workplace, my team lead M created a very difficult environment for me. Because I was not allowed even short breaks, I sometimes had to step out briefly and, on one occasion, pretended I was on a cigarette break just to avoid further complaints. She then told others that I was smoking, even though I am a non-smoker.

My concern is that, because I have generalized anxiety disorder, I have become unusually fixated and paranoid about the possibility that this false smoking allegation may have been repeated or preserved in a way that could affect my insurance coverage. Even though I know I do not smoke, I worry that inaccurate statements, false accusations, or poison pen letters could be used by an insurer to question my smoking status and possibly affect underwriting, premiums, or claims.

This sounds strange but is this a normal fear? I sometimes do have wild thoughts where very bad scenarios happen to me all the time and I get worried.

Does anyone else have this problem? I sometimes keep visualizing bad scenarios happening to me all the time.

2

Hi @HenryLimanoynomous,

Hope that you have been coping well, I noticed reading your post is that the experience at your previous workplace still seems to affect your sense of safety and trust, even though it happened many years ago. It sounds like the work environment was quite stressful at the time, to the point where you did not feel comfortable even taking a short break openly.

I also think it is important to look at the situation fairly and calmly. Wanting a short break during strenuous work is understandable. At the same time, because you mentioned to others that you were taking a cigarette break, your team lead may have repeated that information to others believing it to be true. That does not mean the environment was supportive or healthy, but it may help to separate the actual incident from the fears your anxiety is attaching to it now.

You mentioned having generalized anxiety disorder, and that part feels important. Were you formally diagnosed by a doctor or mental health professional? And are you currently receiving support or treatment for it?

With GAD, it is common for the mind to become very focused on possible future problems, especially situations involving uncertainty. People may repeatedly think through “what if” scenarios, imagine negative outcomes, or worry about consequences even when there is little evidence that something bad will happen. Fear and uncertainty can easily lead to rumination.

From your post, it sounds like your mind keeps revisiting the possibility that this old incident could somehow affect your insurance or future. The concern itself feels real emotionally, even if another part of you may recognise that the likelihood is low.

It may also help to notice whether you tend to manage stress quietly on your own or avoid letting others know when you are struggling. Sometimes when anxiety is hidden for a long time, the internal pressure becomes harder to cope with because there are many worries that remain unspoken.

You do not need to disclose your condition widely if you are uncomfortable doing so. But speaking to a counsellor or mental health professional may help you work on:

  • managing anxiety around uncertainty
  • reducing rumination and worst-case thinking
  • coping with workplace stress in healthier ways

From a practical perspective, insurance assessments are generally based on formal medical records and declarations rather than workplace rumours from many years ago.

I do not think your fear is “strange.” It sounds more like anxiety attaching itself strongly to uncertainty and trying to protect you by overthinking possible risks. The difficulty is that the more the mind searches for certainty, the harder it becomes to feel settled. Let us know how are you coping?