In recent light of unfortunate events that had taken place in a spent of 2 years, is it fair for me to lose my motivation to work? 8 years ago I made a decision to enter my field of work. I pulled up my socks and dedicated close to a decade of my life developing my skill sets both technically as well as academically paving my experience in my career. Today I am exactly where I hoped to be in terms of my position and appointment at work… however, going back 2 years ago in 2022 my mum passed away unexpectedly while I was in the midst of completing my last semester before graduating. That broke me, shattered me into a million pieces the pain that I don’t know if I’ll ever recover from. Not being able to even say goodbye to my mother just tears me apart…
Nevertheless my friends and family stood by me and with their love and support and by the grace of god, I graduated in early 2023 and towards the end of 2023 I got to learn of my beloved uncle’s terminal illness his battle to cancer was short lived and I lost him just before Christmas… another blow to my face… by then I already felt like I needed a change of environment and so decided to take on an opportunity with a new company with better compensation of cos… and so my new journey to a fresh start begins… a couple months into my new role disaster struck for the 3rd time. I got home one day only to find my dad collapsed on the kitchen floor with his hands clasping his heart, perspiring profusely. After some back and forth with 995 over the phone, soon after the paramedics arrived at my doorstep only to tell me that my dad is going into cardiac arrest and his readings were off the charts… worried we rushed to the hospital where he succumbed to his long lists of complications for a month before passing away… all these whilst trying to stabilise my team on our newly awarded contract. I simply didn’t have the motivation to carry on yet alone face my clients and my bosses… fast forward to this very day where I jumped ships taking on a promotion with a new company only having to find myself feeling so extremely lost and depressed and the lack of empathy, patience, understanding, perseverance to face tmr and the next day and the day after and so on… on the verge of surrendering. What should I do??
Hi user1461
I am very sad to hear of the three losses you experienced in your life in a short span. I thank you for the courage to bring this up and for seeking ways to better understand what you are going through and hopefully improve the situation. I think it is fully valid and understandable how the grief from the losses spills over to all part of your life - this is only you being human. Experiencing profound loss, especially multiple significant losses in a short period, can understandably lead to feelings of demotivation and despair in your professional life.
I encourage :
Acknowledging Your Feelings
Understand Grief: Grief is a natural response to loss, and it can manifest in various ways, including a lack of motivation at work. It’s important to acknowledge that what you’re feeling is valid and not uncommon after such traumatic experiences.
Seeking Support
Professional Help: Consider talking to a therapist or counsellor who specializes in grief. They can provide strategies to cope with your emotions and help you process your experiences.
Open Communication: If you feel comfortable, share your situation with trusted colleagues or supervisors. Transparency about your challenges can foster understanding and support in the workplace.
Finding Coping Strategies
Structured Grieving: Allow yourself specific times to grieve. This could mean setting aside moments each day to reflect on your feelings, which can help prevent overwhelming emotions from interfering with your work.
Self-Care Practices: Engage in activities that promote well-being, such as exercise, meditation, or hobbies that bring you joy. These practices can help alleviate feelings of depression and anxiety.
Reframe Your Goals: Reflect on what initially drew you to your career and consider how those elements might still exist in your current role or in future opportunities. This can help reignite some passion for your work.
Set Realistic Expectations: Understand that regaining motivation will take time, especially after such significant losses.
Explore New Opportunities: If you continue to feel unfulfilled in your current position, consider exploring other roles or environments that might better align with your needs during this healing process.
It’s fully understandable to lose motivation after enduring such profound losses; grieving is a complex process that affects every aspect of life, including work. Prioritise your mental health and seek support as you navigate this difficult period. Remember, healing takes time, and it’s okay to take the necessary steps to care for yourself while finding a path forward in your career. 
hello @user1461 so sorry to hear about the grief and losses you have experienced at a young age. Do you still have a strong support system that you can turn to for a listening ear and a shoulder to lean on? It seems like you had friends and family who supported you after your mum passed. I think it will be good to reach out to them. It can be hard to manage all these emotions and burden alone, and sharing them with others who care can help alleviate the pain sometimes. There are also grief and loss support groups that you can explore - it can help to hear from others on the same journey as you.
I encourage you to focus on healing yourself at this stage and getting to a better state emotionally. Try to create a wellbeing routine which can include going for physical activity, eating well, meeting with others - things which bring you joy. You seem to be doing well in your job and career and this is great - perhaps this aspect of your life can take a backseat for a while as you focus on building back internal strength.
I don’t know what to say, @user1461. It feels like you’ve been through so much in a short span of time. I cannot imagine losing so many family members so quickly.
I think you’ve shown immense strength by continuing to move forward despite these challenges. Have you considered a sabbatical from work just to take some time off and regroup?