loneliness and depression

i feel lonely and nobody gets me. i always sleep all day and have no motivation to go out.

i always go out alone and visit places whenever i feel coop up at home usually . just to be near other ppl.

but now it doesnt help. i just want to go back home n sleep. i can sleep the whole weekend away . at most , i’ll get up and get snack bar and back to bed. how do i break out of this funk?

1 Like

Dear @user9920

Thank you for reaching out and sharing what you are going through. It sounds like you’ve been carrying a lot — sleeping all day, not wanting to go out, feeling disconnected even around people. That kind of heaviness is real, and it’s not your fault. Please know that you are probably worn down, probably in ways that have been building up for a while.

If may help to reflect when this started. Has something triggered it, or did it just slowly creep in? Sometimes naming when it began gives a bit of clarity.

I know it’s tempting to avoid everything and just shut down, but avoiding tends to make the feelings worse. The longer the cycle continues, the harder it gets to break. That’s why it’s important to do something, even if you don’t feel like it. May I gentle suggest you take the first step to act despite how much you feel like avoiding. For example, get out of bed to open a window. I believe that though it does not feel like much, but it’s a way to quietly push back against the heaviness.

If you feel safe enough, try reaching out to someone you trust. Even a short message like, “Hey, I’ve been feeling a bit off lately. Just needed to tell someone.” You don’t have to explain everything. Just being heard can help.

I also believe talking to a counsellor could make a big difference. What you’re feeling sounds deeper than just a rough patch, and you deserve proper support. A good counsellor won’t judge you — they’ll help you untangle things at your own pace.

Please do try one small step forward today even though your mind tells you it’s safer to avoid. Slowly, build in more activities and remember to celebrate every small victory.
:yellow_heart:

Hi @user9920

First off, I just want to say that it takes a lot of courage to come on here and share about your worries, so kudos to you for taking that first step! From what I’ve read on your post, it seems you’re feeling a little lost as to how you can overcome feelings of loneliness, so here are some methods that you can try out!

Finding connection often helps alleviate feelings of loneliness. Reaching out to family and friends, even those that you have not seen for quite some time, can be surprisingly rewarding. Even taking the initiative to text something as simple as “How you’ve been doing?” can lead to meaningful conversations, and on the other side, they will appreciate the warm gesture too.

You could also try revisiting old hobbies, perhaps some things that you did when you were younger and stopped but still find some interest in. Exploring new activities can also be an option; I myself enjoy going out for a run or playing an instrument when I feel down, you can discover what works for you! It may be scary for the first time, but who knows, it might be something you never knew you deeply enjoyed, you just needed to take that first step to try.

Lastly, and most importantly, is to be kind to yourself. Understand that it’s human to experience feelings of loneliness and sadness, so don’t beat yourself up over it. If you find it to be helpful, you could speak to a trained counsellor; sometimes, verbalising the challenges you’re facing can give you greater peace of mind. Remember that you can always seek help from the people around you, and there will be people willing to lend you a listening ear. I’ll be rooting for you! :flexed_biceps:

1 Like

Hello User 9920,

Thank you for taking the courage to share your struggles. I do understand your struggles as I was facing it earlier this year as I had an argument with my mom and we didn’t speak to each other for about 4 months.

Being at home and no one to talk to makes me feel isolated and that feeling got worst days after days. Though I did not go out or visit places to be near with others, I usually spend a lot of hours in front of the computer watching movies or just catch up on reading during the weekend. I felt really unproductive and lost because I had a lot of negative feelings bottled up inside and was really hard to express.

What I did to help myself was to write down how every weekend and as I flip back the pages I realised that I was pretty despondent in life and I know innately that I missed the times I spoke to my mom. I decided to just ask her if she needed help with simple task like buying some groceries or even collecting parcels. These small talks day after day help us to glue back the relationship.

Maybe there was a certain point in your life that led you to feel like you were stuck in the rut and perhaps you could share more. Just like a summary don’t have to go into details. Hope you could share more with us. :slight_smile:

U open to be frens? I need to get out of the house too

Dear @user9920 / OP,

It sounds like you’re carrying a heavy kind of exhaustion - not just physical, but emotional too. I hear you saying that your usual way of recharging, by surrounding yourself with people in public spaces, isn’t working like it used to. That feeling of loneliness, even when you’re around others, must be incredibly frustrating. It’s as if you’re trying to reach out from behind a fog but the world isn’t reaching back. And when that effort falls flat, sleep becomes the only shelter left. That kind of withdrawal can start to feel safer than facing the disappointment of disconnection.

And yet, even through all this weight you’re feeling, there’s something quietly resilient in how you’re reflecting on it. The fact that you’re not just numb to it - that you’re naming it and seeking a way out; is powerful. Maybe you don’t need to force motivation or expect instant clarity. Instead, what if you gently shifted focus from fixing the funk to simply staying present with yourself in it, without judgment? There’s a voice in you that wants better, even if it feels drowned out right now.

If you’re open to explore mental health resources to support your well-being, you may visit our Service Wayfinder via this link (https://www.mindline.sg/mental-health-service-providers/start). It allows you to search for resources in the community, based on your age, address and specific needs. The Community Intervention Team (COMIT) and Community Outreach Team (CREST) offers mental health support free-of-charge.

Best regards,
HanSolo2000
Befriender | let’s talk by mindline

thanks for the reply. i wfh and stay at home a lot watching social media , same as you, i have a lot of negative feelings too.

recent events in my life has many stressors and kinda broke me … like i’m on hold and i cant do or plan anything ( i might go to jail any moment) sg judicial process is very long and arduous..

i just want to curl up at home n dont do anything :weary_face:

Hi @user9920,

Thanks for sharing this difficult experience. Although I’m not a legal professional (and therefore might not be able to give a solid opinion on this), I would like to assure you that undergoing legal procedures does not mean that you will “go to jail any moment”.

The Singapore Government allows for all individuals to have the right to a fair trial (except for individuals detained under the Internal Security Act). You have the absolute right to speak to a lawyer prior to having your case heard in court.

With that said, I understand that legal fees may be a concern for many, and there are organisations such as Pro Bono SG (https://www.probono.sg/) that offer legal assistance to those who are unable to afford it. Alternatively, you may always approach your Member of Parliament at the Meet-the-People session within your constituency.

Hope this helps!

Best regards,
HanSolo2000
Befriender | let’s talk by mindline

Hey @user9920. I hear you. That tiredness you’re describing where nothing helps anymore, and even being around people doesn’t ease the ache, that kind of loneliness goes deeper than just being alone. It’s like being disconnected from something inside yourself too.

Maybe it’s not just about motivation, but mourning. Mourning the version of you who used to enjoy going out, who felt more alive just by being near others. And now, it’s like even that version of you feels far away. That’s not laziness. That’s grief.

I wonder… what’s one thing you miss about yourself lately? Not what you should be doing, but who you miss being?

Sometimes, the first step out of the fog isn’t to “do” more. It’s to just remember who you are beneath the tiredness. Maybe write a tiny uplifting note to yourself, not to fix the funk, but to let your heart know, “I see you. I miss you.”

You’re not lazy. You’re not broken. You’re soul’s just tired, and asking to be held with kindness. And I hope you know: you’re worth being held gently, even by yourself.

I’m really glad you shared here. That’s a start and means something :sunflower:

thank you. i tried going out today and do something i like which is cycling.

it helps abit because i feel free n active while doing it.

That’s amazing! Sometimes when our head feels stuck, moving our body helps us to take a breather.

I wonder… what was it about cycling that made you feel most free? The rhythm? The movement? The silence? The breeze?

I hope you let yourself feel proud of that moment. Small steps count, and this one matters!

Good job! :sunflower: