i feel stupid and am unable to make decisions and understand and process things and am constantly overwhelmed. i struggle with deciding what to eat, what to wear etc. i am not able to communicate with people at work and at home, i shun away from everyone and keep to myself. i have problem going to bed and waking up. i am always escaping the reality to scroll reels on my phone.
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Dear @user1716
Thank you for courageously writing in and sharing your experiences. I hope it helps when I share with you that you are not alone in this, and what you’re going through is something many people experience at different points in their lives. It’s absolutely normal to feel overwhelmed and struggle with making decisions, especially when life feels like it’s too much to handle. The important thing is to take it slow and one tiny step at a time. You’re not expected to have everything figured out right now. Start with small steps — like giving yourself permission to rest when you need to and being kind to yourself, even if it’s hard to communicate or make decisions. Progress doesn’t always look like big leaps; sometimes, it’s just about taking it one moment at a time and acknowledging that you’re doing your best. You’re not stupid, you’re just going through something that requires patience. It’s okay to take breaks and escape, but try to focus on what might make you feel just a tiny bit better, even if it’s simply stepping away from your phone for a few minutes. You’re allowed to feel this way, and you’ll get through it. Just breathe, take your time, and know that it’s all going to be okay. Fall back on your strengths and reflect all the challenges you faced successfully in the past. The odds seemed insurmountable, but you overcame them and achieved. You got this!
Thank you for that. I guess I will keep trying;')
but i struggle with deciding what to work on first at work. do i just need to sit down and think and make decision to prioritise which ones first? do i need to be scared of failing and in the worst case scenario and lose my job? then i cant pay for my house. i realised i have been very slow at understanding things now a days. there might have been times were i was quick to pick things up, but i think i never got to practice and perfect things. i was always a quitter. i feel like a mess, its been almost a year of this ■■■■■■ feeling that is getting ■■■■■■■■■ there’s just so many things in life that is new and i am so resistant to learn and change. i just want to stay a kid and have my life organised for me and just stick to it, but at the same time i know i wanted to rebel and seek my own change. but now that i’m out in the real world im scared and i want to fall back but i cant really do it. my family is aging and i will lose them sooner or later. i have no resilience and determination to practice and refine my skills, be it cooking, exercising, conversing, building knowledge in all aspects. is it okay to worry and be scared? sometimes i just think that its better off and easier if i disappear and died. i would take some negativity and burden off my family and friends. i can’t face the judgement from people, it eats at me. i thought of leaving this job to find another one but i think the same thing will happen again if i cant fix myself to get my brain and all working, i will continue shunning people. i think i need help, i should go for counselling but i dont want to pay. i keep thinking about my finances. i dont know what to do anymore. ok ill try doing things one step at a time. thank you for your reply once again, i hope i can use this as somewhat a check in session? :')
Hi @user1716
Yes, please check in here anytime, we are here to support you! When you shared with struggling with deciding what to work on first, it struck a chord with me because it is indeed a tough decision. I think is a common challenge when everything feels important and urgent. The fear of failure—especially when you’re thinking about your job and your responsibilities—is intense, but please remember that everyone makes mistakes and has moments of uncertainty. It’s part of learning and growing, not a reason to believe you’re failing. You are trying, and that’s already something to be proud of. I have found starting with listing all areas which need attention and thereafter addressing those classified as ‘low hanging fruits’ may be one way to kick start the process to build momentum.
It’s also okay to not feel perfect in every area of your life right now. Learning and refining skills, whether it’s work-related or personal (like cooking or exercising), can feel daunting when you’re already feeling exhausted mentally and emotionally. Small steps are important here. Don’t feel like you have to solve everything at once. The fact that you’re aware of wanting to improve and trying to take it one step at a time is a positive first move. And it’s important to allow yourself the space to make mistakes or go at your own pace.
As for the feelings of wanting to escape or wondering if things would be better if you weren’t around, those are really serious and heavy thoughts. I want to say—without judgment—that it’s okay to have those feelings, but please don’t face them alone. It’s really important that you reach out to someone who can support you through this, whether it’s a trusted friend, family member, or a professional. Noting finances are tight, and I recommend you consider some of the free or low-cost resources available:
(i)CHAT
The Community Health Assessment Team (CHAT) provides confidential mental health checks for young persons between 16 and 30 years old, who are currently living in Singapore. They operate CHAT hub, a mental health centre located at *SCAPE and maintains an online presence through their website and webchat.
6493 6500
6493 6501
https://www.chat.mentalhealth.sg/
(ii)Fei Yue Community Services- EC2
LIVE CHAT eC2 is an online facility offering free counselling to youths.
(iii)TOUCH Community Services – TOUCHline
Emotional support and practical advice are rendered through this youth helpline
1800 377 2252
Lastly, it’s really brave of you to acknowledge that you’re struggling. That’s not easy, and it shows a lot of self-awareness. You don’t have to have everything figured out today. Life’s pace is fast, but you don’t have to run with it; go at your own speed. And remember, one step at a time is all that’s needed right now.
Remember to check in :). You’re not alone in this. 
hi caringbee, thank you so much. after reading your replies i really felt so much better and i think something finally clicked in me and i am starting to feel like myself again. i think i just needed time to adjust, i now tell myself it is okay to take a longer time than others to adjust. as long as i am moving forward over a long period of time, its good enough. its okay to have low points but as long as i can bounce back i should be good. slowly gaining momentum and tackling low hanging fruits. building back my confidence, my colleagues and family and friends can see the difference. thank you so much for writing such helpful words.
regarding the resources to shared, i believe i have tried reaching out to all of them but to no avail. they would just try to refer me elsewhere where i most probably need to pay. i cant remember how i found this page but i am so glad i did because it seems to be the most helpful thus far since the last time i had a chance to speak to a counsellor for free at school. thank you for your time and effort in doing this. it is really helpful. i will be sure to check in! have a good day when you read this:) thank you!! <3