i have been dealing with so much lately and t top it off my only two best friends are hanging out together without me. They have been doing everything together and ignoring me. it might not seem like a big deal to you but one of them has been friends with me for 7 whole years and it really hurts me to see her ignore me and betray me like that. i have helped and joked with my other best friend so much i thought she would never betray me but…
she doesn’t really understand the basic rules of girl friendship(iykyk)(for example; she hangs out with the people whom i hate and tgat have hurt me) that i guess she can eventually learn, but i didnt know she would start ignoring me. what did i do wrong? i have always been the person that’s there to comfort her/give her a helping hand, and she just disappeared, ignoring me, and pretended our friendship didn’t exist…. this has worsened my mental health ALOT as I don’t even have anyone to reach out to anymore and this is my only way of reaching out😭
Hello @user6080, I hear you and I want to affirm that you are not alone I can understand how upsetting it must feel to be left out in your own friend group. The fact that your best friend is giving you the silent treatment without any explanation is hurtful and unfair to you! I believe that if she were a true friend, she should be straightforward and directly address any underlying issues instead of giving you the cold shoulder. I am also hearing that she hangs out with those that you have been hurt by previously, which can bring about feelings of betrayal. I was wondering if you have been able to contact her through text, since she may be avoiding you in person. Has that been possible, or does she ignore your texts as well? I hope that this is a mere bump along the journey and that you guys get a chance to speak and rekindle your friendship In the mean time, are you able to rely on your other best friend for support? Please do remember that people are here for you. If you feel unheard, do know that you can reach out here once again. We care about you!
Sorry to hear that you have been going through a very rough patch… “doing everything together and ignoring me”… sounded like that deep kind of hurt where you’re thinking, “out of everyone, she should’ve noticed.” So when she goes quiet like that, it feels personal. Almost like you expected her to at least look your way, or realise you weren’t okay… but she didn’t.
What you talked about, “basic rules of girl friendship,” was the boundary for you. It felt like you thought was understood between the both of you. You had assumed she knew where the boundaries were, and crossing that hurt you, and that she would naturally stand beside you, but instead broke the trust you thought was stable.
Just checking in with yourself for a moment, when you imagine a friend who understands the “rules,” who doesn’t ignore you, who is the one to comfort you… what does it mean for you?
Is it someone who makes space for you without you having to earn it? Someone who notices when you are left out?
It is quite human to turn inward when the person you’ve always comforted suddenly turns away. For now, it might help to know this; friendships do shift, but the shift is not always a reflection of your worth. The pain you are feeling is real because the friendship meant something real. You have been brave to share this and let your hurt be seen.
And if at any point this becomes too much to hold alone, you can always reach out to Mindline 1771 or WhatsApp 6669 1771. I want you to know that you can find someone to confide in when you need it the most.
I’m really sorry you’re going through this. Losing the people you trusted most, or even just feeling left out, can hurt in a way that sits deep in your chest, especially when you’re already dealing with so much. What you’re feeling is completely valid, and it makes sense that this would shake your mental health.
It doesn’t mean you did something wrong. Sometimes friendships shift because people get wrapped up in their own worlds, not because you aren’t good enough or because your presence doesn’t matter. You’ve been a caring, loyal friend for years, and that says more about your character than anything they’re doing right now.
Even if it feels lonely, you aren’t truly alone. Your feelings are real, and you deserve people who show you the same care and loyalty you gave them. And you’re allowed to grieve this, to feel upset, and to take things one small step at a time while you figure out what you need.
I can understand how upsetting it must feel to be left out in your own friend group. The fact that your best friend is giving you the silent treatment without any explanation is hurtful and unfair to you! I believe that if she were a true friend, she should be straightforward and directly address any underlying issues instead of giving you the cold shoulder. I am also hearing that she hangs out with those that you have been hurt by previously, which can bring about feelings of betrayal. I was wondering if you have been able to contact her through text, since she may be avoiding you in person. Has that been possible, or does she ignore your texts as well? I hope that this is a mere bump along the journey and that you guys get a chance to speak and rekindle your friendship 
In the mean time, are you able to rely on your other best friend for support? Please do remember that people are here for you. If you feel unheard, do know that you can reach out here once again. We care about you!